Friday, June 04, 2010

Rape me......

So.....this is one of those posts that has been percolating for a bunch of years. Partly to not embarrass myself, but mostly not to embarrass the other innocent people who are not as mad as I am.

What a concept.

Mostly mostly though...... not to actually find myself in court...... or jail.

But, sometimes......when hideous behavior and injustice percolate for decades.....I think it is OK to at least whisper something about it.


So......let's talk about rape.

One reason I have not been posting much in months is because of how hard I got slammed for talking about obvious assholes like the Bach Festival lady.....and Carmel Unified's response to the many dead children on their watch.

Having just surfed through yet another burial of yet another Carmel who, despite the deep flaws he brought to the program..... wasstill serially and parallely fucked upside down and sideways by the rich kid prep school system we swim in here. In the midst of the poverty no one talks about.

More of that later.

Anyway....let's go back to rape.
Forcible rape, statutory rape, forcible statutory rape, date rape, rape of drunk and drugged people.....rape as a culture.

Carmel has as big a culture of rape as it does a culture of photography.


Especially rape of young girls.

I was on the point of starting a Facebook group: "Do you know anyone who hasn't been raped?"....and then I thought....nah. Not good for business.

Probably talking about this on my blog will not endear me to future brides who check us out on Google.

You can search for 3-ply beverage napkins on Google and find stuff I have been pissed about..... that have nothing to do with catering your wedding.

But, seriously.

There was a time when our unstated local culture embraced priapism.....and rape, especially of girls. And, probably since no one has ever talked about it comes again!

Some small part of this has been in the papers recently, when a completely notorious local serial rapist was finally brought to some kind of partial justice. There is not one man or woman within twenty years of my age (60) who wasn't rooting for the DA, prison and public humiliation in this case.....a large part because every one of us has said or done nothing about this prick for three decades.

Well.....some people did do some things.

Back in the day, when the sky was blue, the sea was green, the hills were golden, and restaurant folks were stars, and not features of the fine print in the back of The Herald.....there were people you could call if there was a problem that lawyers would never be able to straighten out.

(From here on, this is all fiction....or hearsay. Or something where the statute of limitations has run out.)

I have always been a fan of unions. Unions saved my people....the Irish. The sandhog union in New York. The carpenter's union in Ireland.... and on Terminal Island in SoCo.

My grandfather was a union carpenter from Ireland back in the day. You came on as an apprentice at about 12 or 13....and you got all the shitty jobs. One of them was planing wood....boards, planks, whatever. In order to hold the hand plane at ever such an angle, a kid had to bend his little finger over almost sideways, into the palm. After a few years of this, the kid was permanently crippled, with little fingers that were bent inside their palms on a handshake.

No union cards were further necessary to get a job.

All it took was a handshake.

All this is past history now, since Ronald Reagan. But, back in the day....we had local unions that were strong, and their members had houses, and businesses, and their kids went to private schools if they wanted.

Among them there was a local tile-setter union.

So I heard. I have no direct knowledge of this, having never been to the union hall in Seaside with the bar and the pool table and all.

Someone I know closely knew the shop steward of the tilesetters....a sweet guy named Nick. Nick was famous not just for being shop steward of the tilesetters, but also because he had a purple dick. It used to worry him....then with our encouragement he decided to embrace his purple dickness......and he wound up with pretty, kind, girlfriends. Nick was also kind to animals....especially dogs.

So I hear.

Anyway, even twenty years ago....demand for union tilesetters was waning. Union tile guys would hang around the union hall looking for work. Two particular guys I heard about were Vito and Guido.

These are just stories, mind.

Vito and Guido were the kind of guys who never paid for a meal in any restaurant on the Peninsula....because they were sweet, kind, strong, enormous guys who were clearly sociopathic.

Other people's pain made little impression on them. They were very good at collecting money, therefore.

I must admit I once witnessed them collecting a restaurant tab from a guy working for a jeweler in the Barnyard. Vito held the guy up against the wall, while Guido opened the register and took out exactly what the creep owed. No more, no less. Deal with it, loser.

Another time, Vito and Guido were dining on the patio of a restaurant in the Barnyard when Vito spied a guy in the act of stealing the license plates off another patron of the restaurant. Vito and Guido walked over, grabbed the guy, wrapped him up in duct tape and garbage bags and put him in the dumpster......went back to their salads and pasta
.and then informed the restaurant owner. Who might have been someone I know. the gorgeous spring of the rehearsal dinner for the wedding of a Bar and Restaurant Goddess....... when the now-famous serial rapist showed up in a Cadillac....spoke wheels, cabriolet top....with license plates: "BEG ME!" with a 15 year old girl....suddenly tile-setting came to the minds of all the restaurant guys present.

A hat was passed.

X-rays of the now famous serial rapist will show a lot of healed damage to his major joints and bones....when he gets to prison.
He was busted for one rape....and there is probably a Facebook group of dozens and dozens out there that will never be formed. Most of them under 16 at the time.

Meanwhile.....the now Famous Rapist is not by far the only one of his clique. All of them are still out there...well, most of them.

Vito and Guido....and Nick.....are so long gone that even the Australian Shepherds we named for them are also long, long gone.

So, where is the justice? Fool me once...shame on you, fool me twice....shame on me only goes so far....

There was a culture in Carmel in the late '70's and early '80's where it was completely OK for rich boys and business guys to grab 14 year old girls off the streets, take them to remote places...riverbanks, since-demolished houses in Pebble Beach....and rape them. Nothing was ever done. The victims have been dealing with this and working around it in their heads ever since.....and in the continuous presence locally of their rapists. At 14, with the kind of support one gets at Carmel High for this sort of do you figure out how to live the rest of your life?

Beyond that.....the rape culture even permeated even the schools. I can't tell you how many local women I have talked to who had sex with their teachers....and have worked their heads around to make it seem like it was completely fine. In recent memory the girl's track coach at Carmel High had a "serious" relationship with a 15 year old serious that everyone, including the administration....knew about it. And did nothing. Worse....they appointed the guy to be the coach of a girls' varsity team as some kind of perverse award.

So....I am not sure what the statute of limitations is on rape, vs. the threat of litigation against libel and slander. Libel and slander occur only when you say or publish something you know NOT to be true, that can be proved not to be true, and which have been said or published with the express intent to injure someone falsely.

Even beyond that....Sullivan vs. The New York Times brings the Supreme Court onto the side of risky truth. I am not repeating anything I know not to be fact....and I have no intention of injuring anyone falsely....even the victims.

Also, I do know that many, many civil litigations have taken the place of criminal litigitions where there were gutless prosecutors.....and justice has been done civilly in the long run. So, famous serial rapist with the rich family.....bring it on. I am not taking you on for something you didn't actually do.

Roman Polanski has been much in the news in the last year for his rape conviction for having sex with a 13 or 14 year old back in the day. The victim was set up by her mom....and has come forward as a witness for Polanski: "Let it go....." A lot of the press and public opinion is running in the same channel....

Sorry....not me. This girl's life...ideas about love and sex and intimacy...and maturity....and family and society....were all changed by an afternoon with someone who knew better, and had immediate needs he thought were more important than 10,000 years of history and culture. And her own mother sold her out.....

Roman Polanski needs to stuffed in a bottle and floated out on the Japanese current....or put in the general population at Corcoran. Those boys will teach him all he needs to know about love and sex.

So.....back to here and now. This same stuff still goes on. Famous Rapist still has friends who aided and abetted him, and participated in the exact same crimes.

Vito and Guido could not keep up....though I hear that not all of the suicides off the Bixby Bridge were voluntary.

Just a rumor.

Vito and Guido were righteous...but they missed a few. They missed a lot.....

Right now you could buy a Toyota in Seaside from another long-term serial rapist of young girls. He used to sell Fords in fact he sold a big Ford to a woman I know who defends him....and she also still defends the high school English teacher who had sex with her when she was 15.

Can you say "Stockholm Syndrome"?

A guy I know has spent 15 one time or another....following this same car salesman home away from the dealership. More than a few times he has been right behind the rapist with a Colt Woodsman .22, walking quietly, mind turning over the righteousness, the justice...... as the rapist walked back to his wife and family in Seaside.

Not to murder....just to pop a cap in the prick's lower spine.

To let him become as dead to pleasure, friendship, intimacy..... and love...... as all the little girls he fucked..... still fight to not be.

Where are Vito and Guido when they are needed?

This stuff still goes on today.....every day.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Joe Fitz

Can't let the day end without a word about one of the great restaurant guys of all time who passed this weekend......Joe Fitzpatrick. Joe wrote a daily food and social column in the Herald for years. He made eating in restaurants, drinking in bars....and reading the Herald, for that matter, into something that felt like joining a club. Joe generated magic about our trade, and brought all of us more customers than we deserved. I regret that he never made it to The Store...Joe would have laughed his ass off....

I was thinking about Joe the midst of our economic downturn/recession whatever. The news reports list the previous recessions: 1978, 1987, 1990, 1992......I don't know, I am just making up numbers....but I never noticed recessions before this one. In many of those recession years I actually opened restaurants and started businesses and everything worked out.

Why? There was a buzz. There was a guy who had the inside scoop, who didn't lie....well, much....and if he did he had a way of telegraphing it so that you knew that he knew that you knew....

Every morning there was a column about restaurants and food and who was who. It got people up off their butts and out in public....spending money. If you wanted to be where the action went to places Joe wrote about.

There are lots of great restaurants and bars that start up and are great for a short while.....but no one hears, no one notices....and they fade away. And there are other great restaurants and bars that are there for you every day, day in day out....and you all forget about them because no one hears what is going on. Joe would have loved Mundaka...loved Christopher's. Loved Dametra. Joe would have loved Passion Fish. Joe would have loved Taqueria Garcia.

Joe would have loved a bunch of places that could really use his help right about now.

The last time I saw Joe was at Safeway at mid-Valley. He was clearly struggling. Moving slowly. Joe was tall, and old age is harder on tall folks. We talked and cracked some jokes....shook hands carefully....and Joe shuffled off to his car. A bright red Porche Boxster. Fuck yeah....Go Joe!

Joe and I share a space on the wall of the Rio Grill....that association gives me great honor. Bert and Ted, Billly Quon, Tony Tollner, Csaba Ajan, Kenny Fukimoto and all the other old restaurant souls should commission a statue of Joe. Me too, come to think of it.

Only problem...the statue would have to be portable.

Joe wouldn't want his memory to stuck in a place that sucked.

RIP were a long time coming...and you will be a long time gone.