Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Unthinkable........

This post comes from way out in left field.

Come to think of it.....all my posts come from way out in left field.

Unbeknownst to all of us.....there is no longer a Trauma Center on the Monterey Peninsula.

So.....if you fuck up, the EMT's call an Air Ambulance and you are flown to either San Jose or Stanford.

A girlfriend of Nike's fell off her horse last week and hurt herself pretty badly. Well, on the brutal chef scale of injuries....not that bad.

I could have used her last weekend. Broken ribs, sprained wrist, broken arm....cracked vertebra. She could have made crab cakes and olive balls. We already have the Vicodin.

Still.......Horses are really tall....and the ground in Cachagua has big accumulations of silica we call rocks.

The Cachagua Volunteers responded....diagnosed the broken back thing among the other problems and called for the airlift.

No local Trauma Center, see.

They made the right call. I would stick a 9mm in Donald Trump's eye-socket if one of my people fell off a horse. Donald, gimme the cash......just steal it from Leona Helmsley's dog.

The cost of the flight? $26,000.

Dad of course has no health insurance. But he has........had....... a house.

Cachagua Fire just bought a new engine with the funds that eventually trickled down from the Basin Complex fire. One of the highlights of the whole six week nightmare was when Callie got a ride in one of the red helicopters (different from the black ones that are coming for me after embedding Al Jazeera earlier today).

I say we get Gerry Paddock to buy a fucking helicopter. Callie and Gerrit can drive it.

Helicopters....the most visually exciting and the most practically useless tool in the fire-fighting shed....bill out at $2,000 an hour sitting around, 24-7. Their action fee is something crazy. Throw refrigerator magnets at your Frigidaire......$20,000 per hour? $40,000 per hour?

In the meantime.....you can go to the CalStar website and become a member.

At $26,000 a rescue....they are a non-profit, 501-C3. Insuring me, Amanda, Brendan, Dylan and Nike cost me $45 for an entire year just now.

It takes five minutes......and $45 barely buys a tank of gas to drive to CHOMP.

Or you can wait until I convince Gerry Paddock to buy a chopper......and Cachagua Fire to train Callie and Gerrit to drive it.

Gerry is a nice guy......but so tight he squeaks when he walks.

I would join CalStar.

Oh....and I would send Cachagua Fire some love at the same time.

Think about it.

You fall off your deck. You call 911. They call everyone including Cachagua Fire. This require radios, a fire station full of cool shit, a vehicle maintained and ready to come and save your dumbass, and a bunch of folks carrying a ton of stuff they use to save you and have to throw out later.

Each rescue costs thousands and thousands of dollars.

You might pitch in twenty bucks a month.....against the odd chance.

Believe me, these guys are not spending the money on cool uniforms......

Cachagua Fire.

1 Comments:

Blogger Sequoiagrapeboy said...

$14,651 is the current total for costs incurred by my kick-ass, always there, handle any emergency, co-winemaker, friend Antero for simple diagnosis of kidney stones and treatment at Salinas Valley Memorial.

Our system is fucked beyond belief.

I am just happy he had someone to drive him...

Sparkle-Nuts

5:07 PM  

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