Sunday, November 29, 2009

Secret Service.....

If anyone was wondering seriously about the relative importance of two social climbers making into the State Dinner at the White House.....wonder no more.

I have passed Secret Service scrutiny three times....minimum. Any outfit that would allow me within wine-pouring distance of a sitting President, former President, or Presidential candidate.....has a deep and abiding trust in the goodness of mankind. turns out the dumbass Obama's fired the woman in charge of vetting all the social guests to the White House in advance, and who was always present at the door of all social functions to double check the lists and find problems. Well, they didn't fire her....they just demoted her to the point of absurdity. She was a hold-over from the Bushes, you see. Been on the job since 2001. Knew every idiot in Washington.....

Let's see: Obama kept the Secretary of Defense from Bush....and every one of the politically appointed US Attorneys from the Bushes....and fired the chick who can tell chicken from chicken shit on the red carpet?


They probably also fired all the little old lady volunteers who hand-wrote thank-you letters to all the visitors and for all the gifts sent to the White House. They probably have a high-tech firm send out printed letters. So much more sustainable and efficient.

Believe me.....don't let Republicans run your war, but don't let Democrats anywhere near your State Dinner. They don't know fish fork from oyster fork....and they are prone to fake Rolex's and Thom McCann's. When it comes to parties, Democrats could fuck up a wet dream. Plus, they don't know when to leave.

I think Obama missed a key appointment when he failed to hire Ray Krenske (aka "The Radiator" as the door guy at the White House.

Ray worked for us for 20 years....and has since retired to Denver. Ray was fired from virtually every service establishment (Mediterranean Market, Nielsen's, DoReMi, Thunderbird, Bird of Paradise, Grapes of Wrath, etc )on the Peninsula for being rude to the public. Actually, Ray was never rude.....Ray just did not suffer fools.....or rudeness....gladly. He would have spotted the Salahi's at fifty paces.....

Ray was a discalced monk....and a theatre buff and professor. Ray was straight out of Gosford Park. Some would say,not so straight..... but not me.

Classic Ray: Pebble Beach fancy dinner party with Peter Ueberoth, Arnold Palmer and various CEO's in attendance. A scattering of locals and press were invited for cocktails before dinner, but dinner was for 12.....period. Place settings, china, flowers, menu to match all of the above decided months before.

The writer from Forbes Magazine failed to leave on cue at 7:45, and seemed very comfortable sitting on the couch in front of the fire overlooking Cypress Point with a Waterford crystal tumbler of Glenmorangie in his hand.

The hostess was stressing: Cypress Point rules decree that dinner must be served by 8:04. Forbes boy was still there, and immune from all her subtleties. We turned Ray loose.

Ray came into the family room, and in his most imperious voice announced: "Dinner is served.....for all the invited guests."

Forbesy actually got up and made a move for the dining room. Ray gripped him firmly by the arm and steered him to the coat closet and the front door.

"Sir, I am sure you have somewhere wonderful to go to just now......"

"Well, actually......I don't."

Ray...handing him his coat and shoving him firmly through the front door......into the pouring rain.



Blogger Brittons of Provo said...

Oh Ray...I miss him.

6:16 PM  

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