More Fishy Foods

So, I called Costarella Thursday morning to order my wild salmon to smoke for Turkey Days. The guy there mistook me for "Mike from Whole Foods" instead of "Mike from Moveable".

When I asked what the salmon story was he said: "Farmed from Norway."

I said, "Not for me, baby!"

"Yeah, yeah, I know.....none of you guys are gonna be very happy with that, but what ya gonna do?"

"Uh....... buy wild fish?"

"Who IS this?"

"Mike from Moveable in Monterey....."

"Oh, shit. I thought you were the Whole Foods guy! no.....I got whole frozen wild kings from Mendocino.......I got 3000 pounds......."

I ordered $600 worth.......four fish!

So...thoroughly irritated.....I called up Whole Foods and asked for Kelly, the manager. She called back the next morning, before my first coffee. I was charming.

I explained to her that I had personally been carrying into her store 50# of "American Gold" farm fish every week, and I had still not seen any farm labelling in the fish counter.

Oh, and I mentioned that the tail of the ''frozen wild California fish'' they sold us came back from the DNA lab as having been born at the University of Washington. Blade Runner fish, not wild by any means. Well, the counter guy could have made a mistake.....it all looks the same. Let us see what the next sample says.

Oh, and I mentioned KPIX-TV and my English reporter buddy at KGO-TV....champing at the bit for some news that did not involve ass-grabbing politicians. I mentioned civil fraud....class action lawsuits....cheery morning stuff like that.

Dear Kelly was completely unaware her store was even buying farm fish. Purchasing is all run out of the district office. She swore up and down that they as a company want to be on the right side of things.....

I asked, "If Whole Foods wants to be on the right side of things.....sustainablility, I guess.....why have they invested in a 15 million pound a year farm in the San Juan straights?

"I will call our fish manager on his cell phone right now.....and have him call you."

I know you will be SHOCKED to hear that no one ever called me back.......

Dear Kelly probably got Ed-jick-ated by the brass.

I wonder what she doesn't know about her produce suppliers.....and her dry goods suppliers.....and her bakery......

And, speaking of produce.....is it deceptive to put a big pile of hugely overpriced commercial apples between two smaller piles of similarly priced organic ones? Not technically......

Whorish Hypocritcal Overpriced Lying Eco-Terrorists Foisting Off Offal to Deluded Snobs?